A good Irishman, John OReilly, met regularly with his toastmasters club. One evening they were hitting the Guinness Stout and having a contest as to who could make the best toast.

John OReilly hoisted his beer and said, Heres to spending the rest of me life, Between the legs of me loving wife! That won him top prize for the best toast of the night.

He went home and told his wife, Mary, he won the prize for the best toast of the night. She said, Aye, and what was your toast?

John replied, Heres to spending the rest of me life, sitting in church beside me wife!

Oh, that is very nice indeed, John! Mary said.

The next day Mary ran into one of Johns toasting buddies on the street corner. The man chuckled leeringly and said, Did you know that John won the prize the other night with a toast about you, Mary?

She said, Aye, and I was a bit surprised myself. You know, hes only been there twice! Once he fell asleep and the other time I had to pull him by the ears to make him come!