You might be a redneck if

Your grandmother has ever been asked to leave the bingo hall because of her foul language
your entire family has ever sat around waiting for a call from the Governor to spare a loved one
youve ever raked leaves in your kitchen
your stereo speakers used to belong to the Moonlight Drive-in Theater
you call the time you won a free case of motor oil the day my ship came in
you clean your fingernails with a stick and you hammer bottle caps into the frame of your front door to make it look nice.

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