Snappy answers to sappy questions:

All your puny problems solved in 10 words or less!

Q: Dear Abby,

What can I do about my little brother? Hes such a pest!

A: Have you tried a flyswatter?

Q: Dear Abby,

My boss is a mean, unappreciative slave driver who constantly belittles me. What can I do?

A: Shut up and get back to work!

Q: Dear Abby,

My dad insists I clean my room! How can I get out of this?

A: Get a new dad.

Q: Dear Abby,

Why are you so lazy?

A: Dear loser, Why are you so stupid? Next question.

Q: Dear Abby,

Help! I need to lose weight! How can I stop eating all the fattening foods I love?

A: Send them to me and Ill eat them for you.