With Viagra such a hit, Pfizer is bringing forth a whole line of drugs
oriented towards improving the performance of men in todays society….
DIRECTRA – a dose of this drug given to men before leaving on car trips
caused 72 percent of them to stop and ask directions when they got lost,
compared to a control group of 0.2 percent.
PROJECTRA – Men given this experimental new drug were far more likely to
actually finish a household repair project before starting a new one.
CHILDAGRA – Men taking this drug reported a sudden, overwhelming urge to
perform more childcare tasks — especially cleaning up spills and
little accidents.
COMPLIMENTRA – In clinical trials, 82 percent of middle-aged men
administered this drug noticed that their wives had a new hairstyle.
Currently being tested to see if its effects extend to noticing new clothing.
BUYAGRA – Married and otherwise attached men reported a sudden urge to buy
their sweeties expensive jewelry and gifts after taking this drug for only
two days. Still to be seen: whether the drug can be continued for a period
longer than your favorites stores return limit.
NEGA-VIAGRA – Has the exact opposite effect of Viagra. Currently undergoing
clinical trials on sitting US presidents.
NEGA-SPORTAGRA – This drug had the strange effect of making men want to turn
off televised sports and actually converse with other family members.
FLATULAGRA – This complex drug converts mens noxious intestinal gasses back
into food solids. Special bonus: Dosage can be doubled for long car rides.
FLYAGRA – This drug has been showing great promise in treating men with
O.F.D. (Open Fly Disorder). Especially useful for men on Viagra.
PRYAGRA – About to fail its clinical trial, this drug gave men in the test
group an irresistible urge to dig into the personal affairs of other people.
Note: Apparent overdose turned three test subjects into special prosecutors
LIAGRA – This drug causes men to be less than truthful when being asked
about their sexual affairs. Will be available Regular, Grand Jury and
Presidential Strength versions.