Three women are about to be executed. Ones a brunette, ones a redhead and ones a blonde. The guard brings the brunette forward and the executioner asks if she has any last requests.She says no and the executioner shouts, Ready! Aim! Suddenly the brunette yells, EARTHQUAKE!!! Everyone is startled and throws themselves on the ground while she escapes.
The guard brings the redhead forward and the executioner asks if she has any last requests. She say no and the executioner shouts, Ready! Aim! Suddenly the redhead yells, TORNADO!!! Everyone is startled and looks around for cover while she escapes.
By now the blonde has it all figured out. The guard brings her forward and the executioner asks if she has any last requests. She says no and the executioner shouts, Ready! Aim! and the blonde yells, FIRE!!!

There was a hotel that was widely known for having room service that could provide anything a person could want. A traveler there checked in and immediatly called room service.
He said I want brought to my room, a young virgin between the ages of eighteen and nineteen with blonde hair and blue eyes. I also want four peices of rope, exactly four feet in length, and a whip. Lastly, I want a Hungarian valet, thirty years old, with a dark complexion. Hurry, because Im tired and want to relax. About an hour later, room service called back, Sir, We are very sorry, we have the rope and the whip. The virgin was harder to find because around here, few girls reach that age with virginity intact. We have however, found one of the rare ones and she is somewhat blonde. We are extremely sorry to tell you though, that while we could not find a Hungarian valet as you requested, we have found a Romanian one. Will that do?
The traveler sighed. Im afraid not. So in that case, just send up a doughnut and a cup of tea.

A blond decides that she needs to go shopping


As she buys 8 bottles of hair spray the man behind her asks Why buy that much hair spray


She said Your right it will go bad, but I hear it stays good for a week after it goes bad.

Three blondes died and are up talking to St.Peter. He says, “I have one question and if you get it I will let you into heaven.” He asks the first blonde, “What is Easter?”She answers, “Oh, thats that one time of the year when our whole family gets together and we eat turkey.” St. Peter just shakes his head and says to the next blonde, “What is Easter?”She answers, “Oh, that is the time of year when our family gets together and we all open presents and the fat jolly guy comes down the chimney.”Again St.Peter just shakes his head. He asks the third blonde, “What is Easter?”She says, “Oh thats when Christ died and they put him in a tomb and rolled a rock in front of it.”St. Peter smiles and urges, “Yes… go on…” The blonde continues, “Then once a year we roll the stone away and he comes out and if he sees his shadow we have six more weeks of winter.”

A blonde woman is driving down the road. She notices that shes low on gas, so she stops at a gas station.

While shes pumping her gas, she notices that she locked the keys in the car. So when she goes inside to pay, she asks the attendant for a hanger so that she can attempt to open the door herself.

She returns outside and begins to jimmy the lock. Ten minutes later, the attendant comes out to see how the blonde is doing.

Outside the car, the blonde is moving the hanger around and around while the blonde inside the car is saying…

A little more to the left…a little more to the right

Q: What did the blonde say to the physicist?



A: I just love nuclear fission. What kind of bait do you use??

Q: What are the six worst years in a blondes life.
A: Third grade.

3girls where partying at an illegal party when the cops came in they ran out the back door, the cops chased them into an alley,the 3 girls each hid in a seperate bag, the brown head was in the first bag and the officer kicked it she said meow and the officer said o its lust a cat, then he kicked the red heads bag and she said ruff and the officer said o its just a dog, the he kicked the blondes bag and she said potatoes!!

Q: If Tarzan and Jane were blondes, what would Cheetah be?

A: The smartest of the three.

3 blondes walk into a bar

you would think one of them would have seen it