Youre so fat that when you went to McDonalds the whole place fell down

your mom its so hairy her legs got bangs

There was this guy at a baseball game, and he had to go to the bathroom really bad, but the mens bathroom was all filled up and he couldnt wait.

He looked over at the girls bathroom and there wasnt a line, so he went in there, entered a stall and sat to go to the bathroom.

He saw 3 buttons. Curious, he pushed the first button and went ah. He pushed the second button and went ooo. Finally, when he pushed the third and woke up in the hospital he asked, What happened?

The doctor said, Didnt you know that the third button is an automatic tampn remover?

Q. If youre Australian going into the bathroom and American coming out, then what were you inside the Batroom?

A. European (Youre a-peein)

There once were three men who were in an air balloon and the Japanese man said, Lets throw whatever you have in your pockets out of the balloon.

The other two men agreed and the Chinese man goes and throws a penny off of the balloon and sees a girl on the ground crying, so he says, Whats wrong little girl?

The girl says, A penny hit me in the head from the sky.

The Japenese man goes next, and he throws off a quarter and sees a little girl on the ground crying so he goes down and says, Little girl, why are you crying?

She says, A quarter hit me in my head from the sky.

The mexican goes last and he throws off a bomb and sees a little boy laughing really hard. Curious, he goes down to the little boy and asks, Little boy, why are you laughing?, and the lil boy says I farted and my house blew up.

THE END

Q. Whats pink and fluffy?

A. Pink fluff, duh!

Wanna here a clean joke?
Im takin a bath with bubbles.

Wanna hear a dirty joke?
Bubbles is my next door neighbor.

The 1st guy walks into a hotel and wants a room, but it is haunted the guy is sleeping when he hears,Dont eat the peanut butter sandwich. He runs away. the 2nd guy gets the same room and hears the same thing and runs away. the 3d guy eats the sandwich and hears, I told you once I told you twice I wiped my butt with the peanut butter slice!

So there is a russian, a coloradan, and and mexican all sitting around the campfire. The russian is drinking a white russian, the mexican is drinking a margarita and the coloradan a coors. So the russian takes his drink, throws it in the air and shoots it. The mexican and coloradan asked why did u do that? he said where i come from we have plenty of those. Then the mexican took his margarita, threw it in the air, and shot it, then the coloradan and the russian asked why did u do that? The mexican replied where i come from we have plenty of margaritas. So then the coloradan takes the mexican, throws him in the air and shoots him. The russian says why did u do that? the then coloradan replies where i come from we have plenty of mexicans!

there was a brunette and a blond they walked into a bar. the 5:00 O clock news was on . the news said that a man was going to commite suicide. the brunette said i bet $50 that the man is going to jump. the blonde says ok!. they find out that the man did jump so when the brunette was going to collect the money she said that she couldnt take it because she saw the 3:00 news and she saw that he was going to junp. the blonde said so did i but i didnt think he would do it again.