Havent I seen you before? = Nice ass.

Im a Romantic. = Im poor.

I need you. = My hand is tired.

I am different from all the other guys. = I am not circumcised.I want a commitment. = Im sick of masturbation. Youre the only girl Ive ever cared about. = You are the only girl who hasnt rejected me. I really want to get to know you better. = So I can tell my friends about it. Shes kinda cute. = I wouldnt kick her out of bed but a pillow over the head might be necessary.I dont know if I like her. = She wont sleep with me.I miss you so much. = I am so horny that my male roommate is starting to look good.Was it good for you? = Im insecure about my manhood.How do I compare with all your other boyfriends? = Is my penis really that small?I had a wonderful time last night. = Who the hell are you?Do you love me? = Ive done something stupid and you might find out. Do you really love me? = Ive done something stupid and youre going to find out sooner or later. How much do you love me? = Ive done something really stupid and someones on their way to tell you by now. I have something to tell you. = Get tested.Ill give you a call. = Id rather have my nipples torn off by wild dogs than see you again.Ive been thinking a lot. = Youre not as attractive as when I was drunk.

I think we should just be friends. = Youre ugly.Ive learned a lot from you. = Next! Im on a long distance call, can you call me later? = I gotta turn on my answering machine.