Oxymoronic One-liners

Exaggeration is a billion times worse than understatement.
Death to all fanatics!
An oral contract isnt worth the paper its written on.
If we do not succeed, we run the risk of failure.
Id give my right arm to be ambidextrous!
The shortest distance between two points is how far apart they are.
Grammar has gots to be one of the most importantest things ever?
I am becoming increasingly worried that there isnt enough anxiety in my life.
I have this nagging fear that everyone is out to make me paranoid.
Life is full of uncertainties…or I could be wrong about that?
Always remember youre unique… just like everyone else.
Not only am I redundant and superfluous, but I also tend to use more words than necessary.

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