Once there was a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. They all had to go to
the desert and take one thing.
The brunette took a water bottle, the redhead took an umbrella and the
blonde took a car-door.
They were walking in the desert with their objects and 3 men came up to
them and said to the Brunette, why have you got a water bottle? The
Brunette replied, To drink water!
They asked the redhead,why do you have an umbrella? She said,Because if
it gets hot I can have some shade.
Then they asked the blonde, Why do you have a car-door? She replied, If
it gets hot all I have to do is roll down the window!
Posted in Blonde |
There were three Blondes on a tiny Island. They all wanted to get off the Island but none of them knew how. So one day a genie came along and granted each one a wish.
The first one wished to become intelligent enough to get off the Island. So the genie turned her into a redhead and she swam off.
The next one said: Thats cool, I want to get more intelligent than her. The genie turned her into a Brunette and she built a boat and sailed off.
The third Blonde was really impressed and wanted to become even more intelligent. So the genie turned her into a man, who used the bridge.
Posted in Blonde |
Q. Why are blonde girls bellybuttons brused?
A. Because blonde guys arent that smart ether
Posted in Blonde |
Listening Passively
There were three guys talking in the pub. Two of them are talking about the
amount of control they have over their wives, while the third remains quiet.
After a while one of the first two turns to the third and says, Well, what
about you, what sort of control do you have over your wife?
The third fellow says, Ill tell you. Just the other night my wife came to me
on her hands and knees.
The first two guys were amazed. Wow! What happened then? they asked.
The third man took a healthy swallow of his beer, sighed and uttered, She
said, Get out from under the bed and fight like a man.
Posted in Gender humor |
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Similarities between Nixon and Clinton
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Nixon: Watergate
Clinton: Waterbed
Nixon: His biggest fear – the Cold War
Clinton: His biggest fear – a Cold Sore
Nixon: Worried about carpet bombs
Clinton: Worried about carpet burns
Nixon: His Vice President was a Greek
Clinton: His Vice President is a geek
Nixon: Couldnt stop Kissinger
Clinton: Couldnt stop kissing her
Nixon: Couldnt explain the 18 minute gap in the Watergate tape
Clinton: Couldnt explain the 36-DD bra in his brief case
Nixon: His nickname was Tricky Dick
Clinton: same
Nixon: Ex-President
Clinton: Sex-President
Nixon: Known for campaign slogan Nixons The One
Clinton: Known for women pointing at him saying, Hes the one!
N?xon: Famous for his widows peak
Clinton: Famous for bringing widows to their peak
Nixon: Well acquainted with G. Gordon Liddy
Clinton: Well acquainted with the G Spot
Nixon: Took on Ho Chi Minh
Clinton: Took on Ho
Nixon: Talked about achieving peace with honor
Clinton: Talked about getting a piece while on her
Posted in Political |
Q: How can you tell if a bank robber is gay?
A: He ties up the safe and blows the guard.
Joke found on http://www.jokedepot.com
Posted in Naughty |
Q: What are three words you dread the most while making love?
A: Honey, Im home.
Posted in Naughty |
Q: Which of the following doesnt belong: wife, meat, eggs,blowjob?
A: The blowjob. You can beat your wife, your eggs, or your meat; but you just cant beat a blowjob.
Posted in Naughty |
An office manager had money problems & had to fire an employee, either Jack or Jill… He thought hed fire the employee who came late to work the next morning. Well, both employees came to work very early. Then the manager thought he would catch the first one who took a coffee
break. Unfortunately, neither employee took a coffee break. Then the manager decided to see who took the longest lunch break – strangely, neither Jack nor Jill took a lunch break that day, they both ate at their desk.
Then the manager thought hed wait & see who would leave work the earliest, and both employees stayed after closing. Jill finally went to the coat rack & the manager went up to her & said, Jill, I have a terrible problem. I dont know whether to lay you or Jack off.
Jill said, Well, youd better jack off, because Im late for my bus.
Posted in Naughty |
Q. What do a gynecologist and a pizza delivery boy have in
common?
A. They can both smell it but cant eat it.
Posted in Naughty |