George W. Bush, in an airport lobby, noticed a man in a long flowing white robe with a long flowing white beard and flowing white hair. The man had a staff in one hand and some stone tablets under the other arm.
George W. approached the man and inquired, Arent you Moses.
The man ignored George W. and stared at the ceiling.
George W. positioned himself more directly in the mans view and asked again, Arent you Moses?
The man continued to peruse the ceiling.
George W. tugged at the mans sleeve and asked once again, Arent you Moses?
The man finally responded in an irritated voice, Yes I am.
George W. asked him why he was so uppity.
Moses replied, The last time I spoke to a Bush I had to spend forty years in the desert!
03
Mar
02
Mar
Knock Knock
Whos there?
Reagan!
Reagan who?
Reagan maniac!
02
Mar
Q: How many Will Rogers does it take to change a dead light bulb?
A: None. He never met a dead light bulb he didnt like.
02
Mar
A husky foreigner, looking for sex, accepted a prostitutes terms.
When she undressed, he noticed that she had no pubic hair.
The man shouted, What, no wool? In my country all women have wool down there.
The prostitute snapped back, What do you want to do, knit or have sex?
02
Mar
A nun is walking down a deserted road when a man grabs her and starts raping her. After the rapist is done, he says, Hey Sister, what are you going to tell the other Sisters now?
Ill tell them the truth, that you grabbed me, threw me to the ground, and raped me twice….unless youre tired. she responded.
02
Mar
Javier y Pablo eran dos hermanos ricos y malvados que asistÃan a la misma iglesia. Cuando Pablo murió, Javier le entregó al pastor un cuantioso cheque para que mandara construir un nuevo templo a todo lujo.
Sólo le pongo una condición: que en el oficio fúnebre diga que mi hermano era un santo, le aclaró en tono despótico.
El pastor accedió y depositó el cheque en el banco. En la ceremonia fúnebre, subió al púlpito y declaró:
Pablo era un hombre malvado que engañaba a su mujer y traicionaba a sus amigos pero, comparado con Javier, era un santo.
02
Mar
Knock Knock
Whos there?
Heart!
Heart who?
Heart who hear you, speak louder!
02
Mar
Inspiration and perspiration are related by more than rhyme.
02
Mar
Whats so good about an Ethiopian blowjob?
– You know shell swallow.
02
Mar
A drunken man staggers in to a Catholic church and wanders over to the confessional box. He opens the door, sits down and says nothing.
The bewildered priest waits for a few minutes, allowing the drunken man some time to collect his thoughts. Growing impatient, the priest coughs to attract his attention, but still the man says nothing. The priest then knocks on the wall three times in a final attempt to get the man to speak.
Finally, the drunk replies: No use knockin mate, theres no paper in this one either.