Begins each day, I pledge allegiance, to Satan – crap, I mean the flag
Instead of apples, kids place eyes of newt on her desk
On math tests, every word problem begins, A broomstick traveling at 50 miles per hour
During Duck, duck, goose one kid actually turned into a goose
When showing The Wizard of Oz, refers to main character as That bitch Dorothy
She requires students to cover textbooks with skin flayed from a hanged man
Shes the gym teacher (…oops, thats Top Ten Signs Your Teacher Is A Lesbian)
Some kid throws water on her, you get a substitute for the rest of the year
Voodoo doll plus pin equals class clown with giant pain in his ass
She smokes Salems – dude, think about it

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