The following our signs seen overseas where the actual message of the signs became somewhat lost in the english translation.
In a Bucharest hotel lobby:
The lift is being fixed for the day. During that time we regret that you will be unbearable.
In a Belgrade elevator:
To move the cabin, push button for wishing floor. If the cabin should enter more persons, each one should press a number of wishing floor. Driving is then going alphabetically by national order.
In a Paris hotel elevator:
Please leave your values at the front desk.
In a hotel in Athens:
Visitors are expected to complain at the office between the hours of 9 & 11 am daily.
In a Yugoslavian hotel:
The flattening of underwear with pleasure is the job of the chambermaid.
In the lobby of a Moscow hotel across from a Russian orthodox Monastery:
You are welcome to visit the cemetery where famous Russian and Soviet composers, artists, and writers are buried daily except Thursday.
In an Austrian hotel for skiers:
Not to perambulate the corridors in the hours of repose in the boots of ascension.
On a menu in a Swiss restaurant:
Our wines leave you nothing to hope for.
On a menu of a Polish hotel:
Salad a firms own make; limpid red beer soup with cheesy dumplings in the form of a finger; roasted duck let loose; beef rashers beaten up in the country peoples fashion.
In a Tokyo hotel:
Please take advantage of the chambermaids.
In a Hong Kong supermarket:
For your convenience we recommend courteous, efficient self-service.
In a Hong Kong dress shop:
Order your summers suit. Because is big rush we will execute customers in strict rotation.
From the Soviet weekly:
There will be a Moscow Exhibition of the Arts by 15,000 Soviet Republic painters and sculptors. These were executed over the past two years.
In an East African newspaper:
A new swimming pool is rapidly taking shape since the contractors have thrown in the bulk of their workers.
In a Vienna hotel:
In case of fire, do your utmost to alarm the porter.
In Germanys Black Forest:
It is strictly forbidden on our Black Forest camping site that people of different sex, for instance, men & women, live together in one tent unless they are married for that purpose.
An ad by a Hong Kong dentist:
Teeth extracted by the latest Methodists.
A Russian chess book:
A lot of water has been passed under the bridge since this variation has been played.
In the window of a Swedish furrier:
Fur coats made for the ladies from their own skin.
On a box of a clockwork toy in Hong Kong:
Guaranteed to work throughout its useful life.
Detour sign in Kyushu, Japan:
Stop—Drive sideways.
Swiss mountain inn:
Special today–no ice cream.
Copenhagen airline ticket office:
We take your bags and send them in all directions.
Moscow hotel room:
If this is your first visit to the USSR, you are welcome to it.
Norwegian cocktail lounge:
Ladies are requested not to have children in the bar.
Budapest zoo:
Please do not feed the animals. If you have any suitable food, give it to the guard on duty.
A notice in a Japanese hotel (ca. 1950):
Please not to steal towels. If you are not person to do such, please not to read notice.
Office of a Roman doctor:
Specialist in women and other diseases.
Acapulco hotel:
The manager has personally passed all the water served here.
Tokyo shop:
Our nylons cost more than common, but youll find that they are best in the long run.
Japanese instructions on an air conditioner:
Cooles & Heates: If you want just condition of warm in your room, please control yourself.
Car rental brochure in Tokyo:
When passenger of foot heave in sight, tootle the horn. Trumpet him melodiously at first, but if he still obstacles your passage then tootle him with vigor.
Two signs from a Majorcan shop entrance:
English well talking. Here speeching American.
A sign on the lion cage at a zoo in the Czech Republic:
No smoothen the lion
A Finnish hotels instructions in case of fire:
If you are unable to leave your room, expose yourself in the window.
In a Japanese restaurant (ca. 1950):
We reserve the right to serve refuse to anyone.