( A fellow named Bill Pfieffer, an engineer in Portland, OR, told me these
jokes; Bill is an immigrant from West Germany, and German humor has always
been a little different from ours. )

In the Bundeswehr (West German army) a company of soldiers decided to have
some fun with their company cook, a short, fat, very un-martial young man.
So every morning before he woke up, one of them would defecate into his boot.
The amazing thing was that the cook accepted this treatment silently. Every
morning he would clean out his boot and go to work as if nothing was wrong.

After several weeks of this, the soldiers began to tire of the game; it
wasnt very much fun because the cook never reacted, and they were beginning
to feel guilty as well. So they sent a delegation to apologize to him and
promise to mend their ways.

The cook heard them out, then said, You are going to stop shitting in my
boots? Fine, then I will stop pissing in your coffee.