What this country needs is a good five-cent nickel.
–Frank Adams
A study of economics usually reveals that the best time to buy anything is last year.
–Marty Allen
Money, it turned out, was exactly like sex. You thought of nothing else if you didnt have it and thought of other things if you did.
–James Baldwin
I hope I dont sound like an old-fashioned stick-in-the-mud, but when I hear about people making vast fortunes without doing any productive work or contributing anything to society, my reaction is: How can I get in on
that? –Dave Barry
Credit cards are VERY dangerous. Every time I try to use one somebody starts chasing me with scissors. –J. Bothne
Many speak the truth when they say that they despise riches, but they mean the riches possessed by other men.
–Charles Caleb Colton
Happiness cant buy money. –Bob Hope
Be wary of strong drink. It can make you shoot at tax collectors, and miss.
–Lazarus Long Time Enough For Love
We survived the 1980s. Back then, the economic program was
called trickle down. That actually meant they were pissing
on you. How the whole theory goes was this: We have all the
money. If we drop some, its yours. Go for it. –Bill Maher
If the nations economists were laid end to end, they would point in all directions.
–Arthur H. Motley
Certainly there are things in life that money cant buy, but its very funny — Did you ever try buying then without money?
–Ogden Nash
In spite of the cost of living, its still popular.
–Kathy Norris
The wages of sin are death, but after taxes are taken out, its just a tired feeling.
–Paula Poundstone
Next to being shot at and missed, nothing is really quite as satisfying as an income tax refund.
–F. J. Raymond
Money cant buy happiness but it will get you a better class of memories.
–Ronald Reagan
Nuclear physics is much easier than tax law. Its rational
and always works the same way. –Jerold Rochwald
The income tax has made more liars out of the American people than golf has.
–Will Rogers
A criminal is a person with predatory instincts who has not sufficient capital to form a corporation. –Howard Scott
The breakfast of champions is not cereal, its the opposition. –Nick Seitz
My mistake was buying stock in the company. Now Im worried
about the lousy work Im turning out. –Marvin Townsend
A banker is a fellow who lends you his umbrella when the sun is shining and wants it back the minute it begins to rain.
–Mark Twain
Im opposed to millionaires, but it would be dangerous to offer me the same opportunity.
–Mark Twain
If you think nobody cares if youre alive, try missing a couple of car payments.
–Earl Wilson
Ive got all the money Ill ever need if I die by four oclock.
–Henny Youngman
If poverty is a blessing in disguise, the disguise is perfect. –Henny Youngman
Budget: A method for going broke methodically.
–Unknown
A budget is just a method of worrying before you spend money, as well as afterward.
–Unknown
Lottery: a tax on people who are bad at math.
–Unknown
Recession is when your neighbor loses his job. Depression is when you lose your job. These economic downturns are very difficult to predict, but sophisticated econometric modeling houses like Data Resources and Chase Econometrics have successfully predicted 14 of the last 3 recessions.
–Unknown
While money cant buy happiness, it certainly lets you choose your own form of misery.
–Unknown
Advertising may be described as the science of arresting the
human intelligence long enough to get money from it. –Unknown