Time Limit: 3 weeks

YOU MUST ANSWER TWO OR MORE QUESTIONS CORRECTLY TO QUALIFY!



1.) What language is spoken in France?



2.) Give a dissertation on the ancient Babylonian Empire with particular reference to architecture, literature, law and social conditions OR Give the first name of PIERRE Trudeau.



3.) Would you ask William Shakespeare to: (a) build a bridge (b) sail the ocean (c) lead an army (D) WRITE A PLAY



4.) What religion is the Pope? (Check only one) (a) Jewish (B) CATHOLIC (c) Hindu (d) Swedish (e) Agnostic



5.) Metric conversion. How many feet in 0.0 meters?



6.) What time is it when the big hand is on the 12 and the little hand is on the 1?



7.) How many commandments was Moses given? (Approximate)



8.) What are people in Americas far north called? (a)Westerners (b)Southerners (C)NORTHERNERS



9.) Spell – CAT, DOG, PIG



10.) Six kings of England have been called George, the last one being George the sixth. Name the previous five.



11.) Where does rain come from? (a) Macys (b) 7-11 stores (c) cats and dogs (D) THE SKY



12.) Can you explain Einsteinss theory of relativity? (a) Yes (b) No



13.) What are coat hangers used for?



14.) The Star Spangled Banner is the National Anthem for what country?



15.) Explain Le Chateliers Principle of Dynamic Equilibrium. OR Spell your name in BLOCK LETTERS



16.) Where is the basement in a three story building located?



17.Which part of America produces the most oranges? (a) Nigeria (b) Florida (c) Canada (d) Australia



18.) If you have 3 apples, how many apples do you have?



19.) What is the phone number for 911?



20.) How many Chinese Urns in a dozen?



21.) If Sacramento is the state capitol of California, what is the state capitol of California?



22.) Where does wood come from? (a) TREES (b) Asphalt (c) Steel



23.) If I have 10 dollars and I give you 10 dollars, how much money do I have left?



EXTRA CREDIT: Using your fingers, count from 1-5.

The most savage controversies are those about matters as to which there is no good evidence either way.

Q: What do you call 20 blondes in a freezer?
A: Frosted Flakes.

Do people in Australia call the rest of the world up over?

I dont think you can really know how heavy something is until it has
fallen on you.

– LeMel Hebert-Williams

A farmer had 3 beautiful daughters who were getting ready to go out on dates. The first beau came to the door and said, Im Eddie, Im here to pick up Betty. Were going for spaghetti, is she ready? No. The second beau came to the door and said, Im Joe, Im here to pick up Flo to take her to the show. Is she ready to go? No. The third beau came to the door and said to the farmer. Hello, my name is Chuck. The farmer shot Chuck.

Those who live by the sword get shot by those who dont. I feel like Im diagonally parked in a parallel universe. Hes not dead, hes electroencephalographically challenged. Shes always late. Her ancestors arrived on the Juneflower. You have the right to remain silent….Anything you say will be misquoted, then used against you. I wonder how much deeper the ocean would be without sponges. Honk if you love peace and quiet. Nothing is fool-proof to a sufficiently talented fool. A day without sunshine is like, you know, night. Atheism is a non-prophet organization.

G. W. Bush was very depressed that people were saying he is stupid. So he calls his good friend Queen Elizabeth, who says, "Now George, what you need to do is to surround yourself with smart people. Let me show you."

She conference calls Tony Blair in and asks, "Tony, your parents had a baby. It isnt your sister and it isnt your brother. Who is it?"

Tony Blair replies, "Its me!" and hangs up.

G.W. Bush then calls Dick Cheney and says, "Dick, your parents had a baby. It isnt your sister and it isnt your brother. Who is it?"

And Cheney says, "Wow, thats a tough one. Let me get back to you."

So Cheney calls Colin Powell and says, "Colin, your parents had a baby. It isnt your sister and it isnt your brother. Who is it?"

And Colin Powell says, "Its me!"

So Cheney calls Bush and says, "Its Colin Powell."

And Bush says, "No, you idiot! Its Tony Blair!"

Yo mamma is such a bad cook that even the cockroaches throw up!

A man is sitting at home one evening when the doorbell rings. When he answers the door, a 6 foot tall cockroach is standing there. The cockroach immediately punches him between the eyes and scampers off.

The next evening, the man is sitting at home when the doorbell rings. When he answers the door, the cockroach is there again. This time, it punches him, kicks him and karate chops him before running away.

The third evening, the man is sitting at home when the doorbell rings. When he answers the door, the cockroach is there yet again. It leaps at him and stabs him several times before making off. The gravely injured man manages to crawl to the telephone and summon an ambulance. He is rushed to intensive care and they save his life.

The next morning, the doctor is doing his rounds. He asks our hero what happened, so the man explains about the 6 foot cockroachs attacks, culminating in the near fatal stabbing. The doctor thinks for a moment and says, Yes, there is a nasty bug going around.

RAINY web