One Friday afternoon, a gradeschool teacher announced she would allow kids to take Monday off from school if that student could tell her who she was quoting. Her first quote was Who said, I have a dream.? A little black kid raised his hand.
The Reverand Martin Luther King said that, Billy answered.
Very good, Billy, the teacher said, you can take Monday off.
From the back of the classroom, she hears someone say Fuckin nigger!
Who said that? she angrily demands.
From the same student she hears Mark Fuhrman. See ya Tuesday, Teach.
Posted in Foul Language |
Two baseball players promised each other. If one of them died frist he will come back as a ghost to tell if there was baseball in heaven. So one of them dies and comes back as a ghost and says, I have some good news and some bad news. Then the other persom says,tell me. so he says,The good news is there is baseball in heaven but the bad news is that your pitching tomorrow.
Posted in Religious |
A man and his friend walks into a bar one saturday night, And the man gets totally drunk. The man starts arguing Yeah Right!. Everybody in the bar keeps on hearing him yell No Way! and finally his friend walks up to him and says Whats the fucks your problem?
. The man replies Well, this little guy here keeps on saying some guy named George W. Bush is the president!. So then the friend replies:
OK, first of all, Geroge W. Bush is the President, and second of all, your talking to a stool.
Posted in Foul Language |
Yo mama is so fat that Jackie Chan couldnt go around her in 80 days.
Posted in Yo Mama |
Knock Knock
Whos there?
Ginastera!
Ginastera who!
Ginastera at the people!
Posted in Knock-knock |
1 acto: sale un café
2 acto: al café le echan pescado
3 acto: al mismo café le echan marisco. ¿Cómo se llamó la obra?
Café con aroma de mujer.
Posted in Chistes chistosos |
A blonde dyed her hair black, and thought she looked so great she decided to go for a drive in the country to celebrate. After a bit, she was driving by a sheep ranch and stopped to look at the sheep which she liked very much. She went over the the rancher and said, If I can tell you how many are in this field right now, will you let me have one? The rancher said, If you can count that fast, sure! The blonde said: 524. The rancher, amazed, told her to take her pick, for that was the exact count. After a few minutes, the blonde came back with her animal. The rancher said, If I can tell you what color your hair was before you dyed it, could I have my dog back?
Posted in Blonde |
Did you hear about the Texan who was so big that when he died they
couldnt find a coffin for him?
-They gave him an enema and burried him in a shoe box.
Posted in Ethnic |
Q: Why do blondes wear green lipstick?
A: Because red means stop.
Posted in Blonde |
A doctor and his wife were sunbathing on a beach when a well-endowed, beautiful, young, blonde woman in a tight-fitting bikini strolled passed.
The woman looked at the doctor, smiled seductively, and said in a very sexy voice, Hi there handsome. How are you doing? before wiggling her backside and walking off.
Who was that?! demanded the doctors wife.
Errr … Just a woman I met professionally, replied the doctor.
Oh yeah?! snarled his wife, WHOSE profession? Yours, or HERS?
Posted in Blonde |