You think the vowels are E..I..E..I..O.
You clean your car or truck out with a leaf blower.
Your tackle box contains dynamite and blasting caps.
31
Dec
31
Dec
You have a set of 16 matching salad bowls, and they all say Cool Whip on the side.
You have to call the police more than once a week to remove your drunk mother-in-law from your front lawn.
Your name is Billy Joe Jim Bob III.
31
Dec
The one what hangs round over yonder, backah Bubbas barn…
Three quarters of the clothes you own have logos on them.
Your grandfather completely executes the pull my finger trick at the family reunion.
31
Dec
You clean your nails with a stick.
You prefer car keys to Q-tips.
Your Christmas cards have a copy of your butt included.
31
Dec
Charlie Daniels is your commencement speaker.
After the divorce you still call your Ex Cuz.
You have a bowling machine in your kitchen.
31
Dec
Your idea of going to see a play involves goal posts.
You think a computer hacker carries an axe.
You keep a chainsaw in the trunk just in case.
31
Dec
Your handkerchief doubles as your shirt sleeve.
Your babys favorite teething ring is the garden hose in the yard.
Your coat-of-arms features kudzu.
31
Dec
You want the opening day of deer hunting season to be declared a national holiday.
Someone knocks on your front door and your back door rattles.
You let goldenrod grow in your yard because it looks so pretty.
31
Dec
The directions to your house include turn off the paved road.
Your dog and your wallet are both on chains.
Every electrical outlet in your house is a fire hazard.
31
Dec
You have to pay your hair care professional in weekly installments of $3.00.
You live close enough to town to get garbage service, but dont use it because they wont come down your driveway to get it.
The fellows on the big garbage moving equipment recoginze your wife…. and wave to her.