Q: How many Green
Q: How many Green Party members does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None, they use light bulbs which dont burn out, so they dont know how.
Q: How many Green Party members does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None, they use light bulbs which dont burn out, so they dont know how.
A blonde and a brunette were sitting on the park bench when the brunette said, My boyfriend used to have dandruff but then I gave him head and shoulders.
The blonde said, How do you give a man shoulders?
A lawyer and a blonde are sitting next to each other on a long flight from LA to NY. The lawyer leans over to her and asks if she would like to play a fun game. The blonde just wants to take a nap, so she politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few winks.
The lawyer persists and explains that the game is really easy and a lot of fun. He explains I ask you a question, and if you dont know the answer, you pay me $5, and visa-versa. Again, she politely declines and tries to get some sleep.
The lawyer, now somewhat agitated, says, Okay, if you dont know the answer you pay me $5, and if I dont know the answer, I will pay you $50! figuring that since she is a blonde that he will easily win the match.
This catches the blondes attention and, figuring that there will be no end to this torment unless she plays, agrees to the game.
The lawyer asks the first question. Whats the distance from the earth to the moon? The blonde doesnt say a word, reaches into her purse, pulls out a five-dollar bill and hands it to the lawyer.
Now, its the blondes turn. She asks the lawyer What goes up a hill with three legs, and comes down with four? The lawyer looks at her with a puzzled look. He takes out his laptop computer and searches all his references. He taps into the Airphone with his modem and searches the Net and the Library of Congress. Frustrated, he sends E-mails to all his coworkers and friends he knows. All to no avail.
After over an hour, he wakes the blonde and hands her $50. The blonde politely takes the $50 and turns away to get back to sleep.
The lawyer, who is more than a little miffed, wakes the blonde and asks, Well, so what IS the answer!?
Without a word, the blonde reaches into her purse, hands the lawyer $5, and goes back to sleep.
Va una de esas niñas locas (Homo) a hacerse ver del médico, y mientras va caminando por la calle se le olvida el nombre del Doctor.
Cuando llega y toca la puerta sale un señor y le pregunta que deseaba
La loca le dice: Perdón, este… ¿el consultorio del Doctor… VERGARA?
No, Este es el consultorio del Dr. GUEVARA.
Y la loca dice: ¡Ay Dios mÃo, en que habré estado pensando!
Who are the five most constipated men in the Old Testament?
1) Cain wasnt Abel.
2) Moses went up onto the mountain and took two tablets.
3) King David sat on the throne for forty years.
4) Solomon – neither heaven nor Earth could move him.
5) Noah was at sea for forty days and forty nights and all he passed was water.
You so poor when i walked in your mamas house i steped on a roach your mama said clap your hans stump your feet prase the lord we got something to eat.
A simple alternative, now that McDonalds has spread to virtually every country on earth, has become to look at what a Big Mac costs, the IW said.
A particularly hungry American can buy five Big Macs for 11 dollars. If he exchanged the money into Deutsch-marks, his 18 marks in Germany can just barely obtain four Big Macs, the IW said.
Conclusion: based on the Big Mac index, the dollar is undervalued, the institute said.
Americans can get their best Big Mac buy these days in Moscow, where one sandwich costs only about 59 cents.
But Russians must work nearly two days in order to afford this meaty capitalist achievement – longer than people in any other country, the IW said.
These are intended for entertainment purposes only. We do not advise that you ever do these things to a roommate or yourself.
184. Study computer science and listen to techno while talking about robots taking over the world.
These are intended for entertainment purposes only. We do not advise that you ever do these things to a roommate or yourself.
131. Sign your roommate up for various activities (Campus tour guide, blood donor, peer tutoring).
A dead Scotsman.