Old and New Jokes

Agi Tator: Whenever things get dull, Agi is always there to stir things up. She is often a nuisance, but many times keeps everyone on their toes by disturbing the comfortable status quo.

Cogi Tator: Cogi is a thinker. She is different from her brother Medi because Cogi thinks deeply about matters that will affect the way she acts. She weighs everything carefully before acting and attempts to make sure she has considered all the alternatives.

Common Tator: Common always has advice or criticism on any subject. Always talking and always very authoritative sounding, he often sounds like he knows what he is talking out, but usually doesnt.

Devis Tator: Devis is a revolutionary. He believes in confrontation, radical changes. It is his philosophy that the only way to change something is to destroy it and start all over. Devis is weak on alternatives or ideas for rebuilding and considers that someone elses job.

Dick Tator: Dick doesnt consult anyone. He makes all his decisions by himself and sees others only as a means to accomplish hiswill. Dick will usually gets high marks for getting things done, but low marks for working with others.

Emmy Tator: Emmy is a follower and can easily become a hero worshiper. Heavily influenced by those around her, Emmys future is determined by the kinds of people she patterns her life after.

Facili Tator: Facili is warm and personable. She is almost selfless. She works hard at enabling others to become better. She is a good listener and asks the kinds of questions that allow people to speak about things that matter to them. But Facili can sometimes be a nuisance because she sees every gathering as an opportunity to use her gifts and sometimes she just needs to let her abilities remain dormant.

Hesi Tator: It is very difficult for Hesi to make decisions. She always needs just a little bit more information before making a decision. If and when Hesi does make a decision, however, it has usually been thought through carefully.

Irri Tator: Irri is a twin of Agi with a mean streak in her. She likes to stir things up just for the sake of causing confusion and disarray. She is abrasive and even when she takes the correct position on a subject, still winds up alienating those around her.

Medi Tator: Medi thinks deeply and finds satisfaction in the act itself. His thinking never really leads to any constructive action, however. It is the act of pondering that matters to Medi and not the content.

Roe Tator: Roe is a systems man. He believes that everyone should have their turn regardless of qualification. He is task oriented and is only involved as long as the task is his responsibility. He believes in changes for changes sake and doesnt like to remain in one spot too long.

Speck Tator: He likes to watch everyone else rather than get involved in anything personally. He is always on the outside looking in. He is usually an expert at evaluating and helps those who are not participating by cheering them on. But because Speck has the advantage of watching from the stands, he can also make unrealistic assessments from a distance and be quite fickle with his support.

Vegi Tator: Some call Vegi lazy because she sits around doing nothing. She doesnt take any risks and tends to take whats given without giving anything in return. But at least Vegi is predictable and somewhat stable.

A man returned home from the night shift and went straight up to the

bedroom. He found his wife with the sheet pulled over her head, fast

asleep. Not to be denied, the horny husband crawled under the sheet

and proceeded to make love to her. Afterward, as he hurried down- stairs

for something to eat, he was startled to find breakfast on the table and

his wife pouring coffee. Howd you get down her so fast? he asked.

We were just making love!

Oh my God, his wife gasped, Thats my mother up there! She came

over early and had complained of having a headache. I told her to lie down

for awhile.

Rushing upstairs, the wife ran to the bedroom. Mother, I cant believe

this happened. Why didnt you say something? The mother-in-law

huffed, I havent spoken to that jerk for fifteen years, and I wasnt about to start now!

A baby turtle was standing at the bottom of a large tree and with a deep sigh, started to climb. About an hour later, he reached a very high branch and walked along to the end. He turned and spread all four flippers and launched himself off the branch. On landing at the bottom in a pile of soft, dead leaves, he shook himself off, walked back to the bottom of the tree and with a sigh started to climb.

About an hour later, he again reached the very high branch, walked along, turned, spread his flippers and flung himself off the branch. Again, he landed on the bottom, shook himself off, went to the bottom of the tree, sighed and started climbing.

Watching these proceedings from the end of the branch were two little birds. Mummy bird turned to Daddy bird and said, Dont you think its time we told him he was adopted?

Why are felines the best ever animals? Because theyre purrrrrrrfect and grrrrrreat!

A famous Hollywood director dies and reaches Heaven. At the proverbial gate, St. Peter meets him and explains that God would like the director to make one more movie.

The director grimaces, But I retired years before I died. Im tired of all the hassles involved in making movies.

Listen, St. Peter explains, We got Ludwig von Beethoven to write a new score for the movie.

Youre not listening to me, the director protested. I dont want to make any more movies.

But we got Leonardo da Vinci to do the set design for you, St. Peter exclaimed.

I dont want to make any more movies! the director insisted.

Now look at this script, St Peter said. We got William Shakespeare to write it for you.

Well, said the director a score by Beethoven, set design by da Vinci, a script by William Shakespeare … How can I go wrong? Ill do it!

Great! exclaimed St. Peter. Theres only one small hitch… Gods got a girlfriend who sings…