Ive learned that sometimes the people you expect to kick
you when youre down will be the ones who do.
31
Dec
31
Dec
It sure would be nice if we got a day off for the presidents birthday, like
they do for the queen. Of course, then we would have a lot of people voting
for a candidate born on July 3 or December 26, just for the long weekends.
31
Dec
The floggings will continue until morale improves.
31
Dec
Hypochondria is the one disease I have not got.
31
Dec
Those of you who think you know everything
are annoying those of us who do.
31
Dec
I believe you should live each day as if it is your last, which is why I
dont have any clean laundry because, come on, who wants to wash clothes on
the last day of their life?
31
Dec
Once, I wept for I had no shoes. Then I came upon a man who had no feet. So
I took his shoes. I mean, its not like he really needed them, right?
31
Dec
24 hours in a day… 24 beers in a case… coincidence?
31
Dec
Health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
31
Dec
You know your old when you walk into an antique store
and someone tries to buy you.